adding ginger to your sass

GingerSass - adding ginger to your sass

Things I learned from Mary Lambert

I saw Mary Lambert‘s show in New York last night with the fiancée (gosh, it’s still kind of weird to say I have a fiancée!), and it was pretty spectacular.

Mary Lambert sparkles. <3

Mary Lambert sparkles. <3

The venue is pretty new (happy 2 months, SubCulture!), and it was a really nice, small, intimate space for a show. No matter where you sat you had a good seat, which was definitely a plus.

I want to believe this is the Mary Lambert seduction face.

I want to believe this is the Mary Lambert seduction face.

Mary Lambert is hilarious in a blunt, adorkable, person-you-want-to-be-friends-with kind of way. She opened up the show by saying how she was in a good mood because her friends had bought her a hotdog, and how hotdogs are one of her favorite food groups are hotdogs. (Cue gifts of hotdogs from lesbians from this point forth!) Mary also said she hoped nobody had been at the Macklemore show the night before, as she was wearing the same dress two nights in a row, “but it’s too sparkly and pretty to not wear again.”

Mary has a powerhouse voice and the show was amazing, but that’s not what I’m blogging about.

Mary taught me a few things last night that made me love her.

  1. Mary Lambert loves Storage Wars. I love that one of her guilty pleasures is one of my guilty pleasures. I wonder if she watches HGTV too?
  2. Mary Lambert loves hotdogs. (See above.)
  3. Mary Lambert isn’t afraid to be an outfit repeater. (Also see above.) I love that she admitted that because I LOVE LOVE LOVE my sparkly black dress and I now feel like I can justify wearing it multiple times because Mary Lambert said it was okay.
  4. Mary Lambert is an autograph ninja. She secretly signed all of the copies of her poetry book that were being sold at her show… which I didn’t realize until I got back to Jersey last night.
  5. Mary Lambert loves her fans and felt really bad that she couldn’t do a meet and greet after her show last night because she had another show in an hour. (Although, just putting it out there, originally I had tickets to the later show and TicketFly moved me to the earlier one so I kind of feel like TicketFly owes me a meet and greet with Mary. Just saying.)
  6. Capitol Records loves Mary Lambert enough to tell her she needs to write more performance poetry for her album.
  7. By the way, her first album with Capitol Records is coming out in a month. Mary couldn’t remember if it was December 17th or 19th, but I think it’s the 17th since most albums come out on Tuesdays.
  8. The Glee cast fought for Mary Lambert’s honor at the VMAs. I would’ve rather seen this than Miley.
  9. Speaking of which, Mary Lambert said she “Hermoine Granger-ed the shit out of her bag” at the VMAs while looking for her VMA ticket. Any individual who says they Hermoine Granger-ed the shit out of something is awesome.
  10. I want Mary Lambert to be a guest at my wedding. She had me laughing so hard I was crying at some points last night. I could totally see myself hanging out with Mary, which is why I think she should read this blog post and become my friend so I can invite her to my wedding. I wouldn’t even have her sing–I’d treat her to hotdogs, cake, and even some cocktails. We’d have a blast.
This is Mary Lambert air hugging the audience because she couldn't do a meet and greet with us after the show.

This is Mary Lambert air hugging the audience because she couldn’t do a meet and greet with us after the show.

Mary, you’re awesome. You’re totally invited to my wedding.


2012: A Year in Review

Tonight is the last Friday night of 2012, exactly one week after the world was supposed to end. A lot has happened in 2012, and I decided to highlight everything significant that happened to me this year, month by month.


It’s been one heck of a year at GingerSass.


Not much happened in January. I turned 22, which was actually a better birthday than my 21st. My friend convinced the bartender at a local bar that I should be given a free bottle of champagne because my 21st coincided with a blizzard and I didn’t get to celebrate. I received a stuffed unicorn and zebra print seat covers from my parents. I, once again, pleaded to Ellen as to why we should celebrate our birthday together and she ignored me. Ya know, the usual.


I made it onto PostSecret for the first time. Whitney Houston died and I was devastated so I wrote a poem. Ryan Murphy pissed me off so I wrote him an angry tumblr post turned into a letter, which he never responded to.


March was a very important month for me– I STARTED GINGERSASS! (All of the posts posted before March 25th were transferred from my tumblr site.) Fun fact– GingerSass was started because I was pretending to be an investigative reporter at the Sex, Love, and Dating Conference. Also, Adrienne Rich died, which devastated me. A lot.


April freaking rocked. Highlights of the month include:

volunteering with NOH8 and later being featured on their website
meeting Frank Warren at my first PostSecret event
saw an opera and a concert in one week
my Poefy (poetry-wifey) was fantabulous in The Vagina Monologues and I wrote about it


May was a good month for me. Obama came out in support of gay marriage. I won an award. I graduated college. Life was pretty awesome to me in May.


June was an interesting month. I started it out writing about suicide after finding out that the partner of my friend who had committed suicide also committed suicide. I wrote a bunch of 10 Minute Musings for a grad class and reconnected with myself. I came out to my family as a blogger, with the support of Cady McClain, aka Dixie from All My Children. I even inspired her alter-ego, Suzy F*cking Homemaker, to create an internet meme. Suzy also encouraged me to write a post on why I want to be a celesbian…so I did. I also  booked and performed my first paid poetry gig, which was pretty darn awesome.


July started off with a roadtrip to Massachusetts with Poefy to the wedding of Taylor and Mike. I basked in the glory of cheeseball goodness. (This post is still one of my most-visited posts, btw.) I fell in love with my job over the summer. I also figured out What Obama Taught Me. I indulged in Restaurant Week. Then I got serious about my blog, invested in an actually site host, got free magnets, and was overwhelmed by the idea of going to BlogHer. I also posted about teacher dress codes, which is also one of my most-visited posts of all time.


August started off with me going to BlogHer’12 and MY LIFE CHANGING FOREVER. I made so many blogging friends through BlogHer, and I’m going to (eventually) categorize them on her so you can so who I’m reading. I also won a happy hour party in August and celebrated with wings and food at a local bar with my friends. Woohoo! To top August off, I started my new job, got an apartment to go along with it, and ruminated on why Res Life will always be a part of me.


September was an emotional, crazy month. I had an awesome first week of September. I was a national runner up to be the next Verizon Ultimate Insider, mentioned on AfterEllen, and yogurt was on sale. I made it through the one year deathaversary of my friend’s suicide, and I participated in yet another walk for dead people. September was emotional, tough, and trying, but I got through it.


October started off with me reflecting on how much I love my car. I also met Jack Hanna, which was a childhood dream come true. I had a kickass lesson on bullying on National Coming Out Day and fell even more in love with teaching. I went to the Dodge Poetry Festival for the first time as an educator, and I helped my students fall in love with poetry. I met Geena Davis and she told me, “You’re changing the world to be a place I want to be in. Keep up the good work.” I saw Melissa Etheridge in concert. I survived Hurricane Sandy, was really upset that Sandy canceled Halloween, and was upset by the whole Sandy experience.


November feels like such a long time ago. I participated in NaBloPoMo for the first time and wrote about how I’m a Jersey girl, how Sandy domesticated me, and what Obama’s win meant to me. I also talked about bacon, ghosts, and just how important it was that I found my voice again by going to poetry open mics. I cut my hair, took silly webcam pics, and thought about my future. I ended my first NaBloPoMo experience by being grateful for stickers, and really having peace in knowing that I’m on the right track for what I want to do with my life.


December flew by. I think the biggest thing that happened to me this month, right before my student teaching internship ended, was that I realized why I want to teach. I arranged for an assembly for my Creative Writing students, and  it really changed my relationship with them forever. It taught one student to not be afraid to be who she is, and this, in return, encouraged me to come out to her. She then wrote me a note and made me cry. Then the Newtown, Connecticut shooting happened and it hit really close to home, as it was the first school shooting that has happened since I began student teaching. My students asked me if I would take a bullet for them, and I was able to respond honestly and say yes. Student teaching ended, and I managed to make it to the parking lot after school before crying. I got creeped out by the whole Elf on a Shelf phenomenon, but secretly loved my creepy little elf.

2012 was a year of growth. I rediscovered my writing identity, and GingerSass became a very large part of who I am. I’m grateful for the opportunities blogging has given me this past year, and I cannot wait to see what 2013 holds.

Happy New Year, folks! What are you looking forward to in 2013?

PS I’m not sure if I’ll be able to attend or not, but if you’ll be at home this NYE, consider joining in on #Tweetin13. There are prizes, fun people, and it’s hosted by two of my favorite ladies. Get on it!

Seeing a Melissa Etheridge concert is something every lesbian should get instead of a toaster.

There’s an old lesbian joke that basically refers to an already experienced woman sleeping with a woman who has never before slept with women. The experienced woman would get a toaster for taking the other woman’s virginity. instead of a toaster, I vote for Melissa Etheridge concert tickets. (Or at least a cd of her older greatest hits since she doesn’t tour that often…)

On October 20th, 2012, I was lucky enough to see Melissa Etheridge in concert at the State Theatre in New Brunswick. The state theatre is a local theatre that’s a pretty neat venue– in the past I’ve seen The Wanted, Cobra Starship, “A Farewell to Pine Valley,” and even Jack Hanna there! All of the seats are “good” seats, and the intimate atmosphere makes for a great show no matter where you are sitting.

The State Theatre always has this on the wall. I found it amusing at the Melissa Etheridge concert… #recruiting

I spent a lot time in high school being convinced that nobody knew I was gay. I even asked for a cd of Melissa Etheridge’s greatest hits for Christmas my Junior year of high school. (Note: That should’ve been a sign.) Once I turned 17 and got my license, I spent many drives to school and work belting Melissa Etheridge songs. (I particularly loved “Ain’t It Heavy” and thought the lyrics were MEANT FOR ME. “I’m feelin’ kinda loose/ I’m feelin’ kinda mean/ I’ve been feeling kinda wild since I turned seventeen/ Or is it madness” obviously discusses how both Melissa & I turned 17 and struggled with out sexualities. For me, being wild meant listening to Melissa as I drove to school. For Melissa, it probably meant a lot of R rated things. 😉 ) Melissa was my outlet before I realized I needed one, and the first woman who taught me I have a thing for women with raspy voices and the ability to play a guitar. *drools*

I saw Melissa perform once before at Live Earth in 2007, along with a ton of other artists. It was a great experience, but the sound was mediocre, I didn’t appreciate her music as much as I could have, and I didn’t understand myself well enough to understand the power and emotions in her music.

Fast forward to today. Oh. My. GAWD.

Melissa Etheridge is a goddess in person.

(The rest of this post will probably consist of incomplete sentences, photos, and videos I took FOR THE PEOPLE and not for my own viewing pleasure.)

By the way, did you know Melissa uses a TON of different guitars, banjos, and harmonicas during her entire show?



Look, it’s like she’s Jesus. She has a glowing halo, or something like it.

Play those keys, sexy lady.

Melissa playing “I Run for Life” in the pink lights…

At this point, the friend I went to the concert with said, “I want to be that harmonica. Imagine all the things she could do with her lips!”

Oh, and this is our hair and smiles at the concert. I don’t have permission to exploit my friend’s identity on the web.


Okay, fine, she’s not great marriage material, but she really fulfills that fantasy of hot rockstar. Don’t believe me? Take a look at these videos I took at the show.




Melissa, you can come over and bring me some water whenever you want.