I have this weird relationship with BlogHer. In an odd sort of way, BlogHer is like an unexpected first relationship.
I first went to BlogHer12 when it was in New York City, and I felt kind of overwhelmed. Even though it was in my backyard, it was still mind-boggling. Blogging was new to me, and I hadn’t quite gotten the hang of it, but OMG everything was new and shiny and the people there GOT MY WEIRDNESS.
When BlogHer13 happened, I was a lot more confident in my blog, and myself. The conference was less new and shiny and more about enjoying the intimacy of being able to be with My People. I went out of my comfort zone by being a model in a fashion show, but, outside of that, I stuck to the familiarity of people I had grown accustomed to.
By the time BlogHer14 rolled around, I was kind of tired and jaded. I couldn’t swing flying out to San Jose for a blogging conference– especially after my first year of teaching, student loan debt, and saving for a wedding. I tried to make it work, and for a brief second it looked like it might, but then my logic came back and I realized BlogHer14, my wallet, and I just weren’t a good mix anymore. It just wasn’t our time.
I’ve kind of been feeling “over” BlogHer, or maybe just over my blog, but then two things happened: 1. I decided to partake in November’s NaBloPoMo, and 2. it was announced that BlogHer15 would be back in my backyard in NYC. I kind of feel like I’m (maybe) going back to an old relationship that I’m not entirely sure about. (It’s feeling like my college years! Ha.) I’m not sure if I’m the same blogger– or person– I was a year or two ago. It’s been more of an effort than a joy to be a sassy ginger. I’ve had more fun connecting with people in the wedding industry on GayBrideGuide. Heck, I don’t even know if I actually will make it to BlogHer15, although I can’t imagine knowing the conference is happening so closeby and being able to stay away.
BlogHer, I can’t quit you.